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 Happy Birthday Boss

Subject: Secretary

Why I Fired My Secretary...

Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me.  As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday.

I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember. The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss.  Happy Birthday."  And I felt a little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then, Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and me."  I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went to lunch.  We didn't go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously.  On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"  I said, "No, I guess not."  She said, "Let's go to my apartment."  After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable"  "Sure!" I excitedly replied.

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ----- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there-on the couch-naked.